Pint-Sized Tyrant

My husband and I knew we were in trouble. We had just booked a second hotel reservation for our vacation in August. He was just sick of going to the same California city over and over again. Why can't we break free? Why do we all have to answer to her?

I said, "We'd better ask her in the morning. We'll see if she'll go for it."

He said, "She's nine-years-old. She'll just have to get used to it."

And I thought, Oh yeah. She's nine.

How did I end up with a child who appears to be a child in all things except for her indomitable will? A child in size only, she is a fully-formed human being of such concentrated purpose that nothing can ever deter her from her vacation goals: in December we will go on a vacation to the same tired hotel we always go to in Tucson, and in August we will go on a vacation to Oceanside. This year she sat me down at the computer until I found a hotel in Oceanside identical to the one in Tucson, and then made me book it.

No matter how bored we get once there, she is excited and thrilled every second. She unpacks completely. She sets up her stuff on the desk in the loft bedroom. She arranges all of her stuffed animals. She is different than she is at home - she is neat. If it's the December trip and we've taken Hanukkah on the road, she's ready with everything: the menorah, the candles, the lighter; she's organized gifts with labels for each day.

Every morning of every trip she is up at the crack of dawn ready to go eat the free breakfast with the Husband and Bar Mitzvahzilla. It's only served till 9:30 so she really has to crack the whip to get Dad out of bed. Since the rest of us tend towards a type of laziness and lethargy, she follows us around with the laptop or the newspaper until we look up movie times, then she lassos us into the car to drive to see them. She is a whirlwind of activity and sheer will born into a family who would easily sleep away their vacation. She'll make something of us yet.

My daughter, the Pint-Sized Tyrant. How do I tell her we're going to La Jolla?